i've found extreme solace in writing out my helluva fucked mind into songs in my extremely old year old songbook called Cadence with the strings torn and pages falling out. it had been dead in my cupboard along with my other deceased possessions but since Ed and I started on about songwriting, it has been REVIVED!

i think i'm rather ironic in my thoughts. so here's the latest : i want to be in love again, to feel it's adrenaline rush, to feel like i can't think about anybody else but that one, to be so excited, to want to sing every lovesong to that person, to make my entire world revolve around him. but, i don't believe in love anymore. well i still do believe in it somewhat, it just isn't tangible. the initial high goes, and all you're left with is holes.

back to cadence.